010. Five Types of Romantic Relationship
In this episode, I talk about the five types of romantic relationships we tend to move through in life; often with the goal of side-by-side partnership.
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There are five different types of relationships (in no particular order): #1 issue-based, #2 compatibility-based, #3 journey mates, #4 fantasy-based, and #5 side-by-side partnership.
No. 1: Issue based relationship.
Your issues and the issues of the other person attract each other. Let me give you a personal example. For a long time I called in unavailable men, because I was dealing with fear of abandonment because my dad moved out when he and my mom separated. Or, it could also be that both people in this dynamic have a similar issue, for instance, fear of rejection.
There is usually a lot of chemistry and physical attraction there which allows us to stay in the dynamics even if we know it’s not good for us.
No. 2: Compatibility-based relationships.
Those are people that you have a lot in common with. You kind of have this best friend feeling, and they can feel like a huge sigh of relief, especially after an issue based relationship. Usually there are no fights, but there's also not a lot of passion. I can kind of feel like roommates.
Here is might be helpful to work with a therapist or coach on really finding polarity in the relationship, that is, embodying your feminine or masculine essence.
No. 3: Journey Mates.
A journey mate is someone who comes into our life, but there seems to be an expiration date.
It's a great relationship. Everything is kind of walking well, but then something happens. And often that might be something external, so it might be a move or some sort of visa situation, something like that. And that is because the person came into our life to teach us something that we needed to learn and that we now get to integrate on our own. So they almost had to go away so that we could integrate.
No. 4: Fantasy-based relationship.
When you fall in love with the idea of someone or with someone's potential. It's thinking that someone will change or that we can change them. And often it might be going after an unavailable person and thinking they'll come around. So that kind of creating this idea of what somebody could be but isn't really.
No. 5: Side-by-side partnership.
It is two people standing next to each other, hand in hand, looking in the same direction as opposed to looking at each other. Both have done a significant amount of work on themselves. They feel whole and complete but not finished Because there's always more work to do. It's when we really know who we are and feel like there's nothing missing.
So it's these two people that are standing there hand in hand and that really stands for that their values and vision are aligned, that they're headed in the same direction and that they want the same thing in life. There's obviously still conflict, there's still fights or things to walk through, but both are committed to growing together and it's sort of like there's three people or three entities in the relationship. There is both individuals and then the thought is the entity of the relationship and that also means that both people are individually committed to their own growth and then they're also committed to the relationship and whatever is in the best interest of the relationship.
I would love to support you in calling in your partner. If you are curious what that would entail, apply for 1:1 coaching with me here and we can jump on a call to see if we’re want to go on this journey together!
